If you can't, then it's best to move on. Take issues as they arise, rather than throwing away what could be a good experience for you and her based off of what might happen.
Besides the obvious brain damage that you will be made to suffer your entire married life, there are future kids to think about.
I don't think you "dodged a bullet" but I do think new residents change Other wives told me my husband would "come back" but we are still in the training so I can't tell you whether that is completely true or not. He never has time for me.
Consider a mix of activities that are inexpensive, and allow you to talk and learn about one another. To just see ourselves as support to our husband's "noble" ambitions.
However, we rarely ever see each other and don't talk that much in between. Now that my boyfriend and I are beginning to talk about a future together, though, I realize that I need to consider this question of marrying outside of the church very carefully.